One-Sided Love Affair

I'm pessimistic in nature.
  I guess that's who I am.
I'm not the type to walk around with a smile when I'm mad.
Sometimes I get so angry.
  Angry at all I see.

Because nothing is the way it is or as it should to me.
  I guess I'm just a selfish girl.
Because I want the world.
I can't help it if my parents taught me to only want the best.
I'm getting real tired of having to second guess.

So if you really want me, you better let me know.
 All you gotta do is show me. Show me that you care.
 Don't let this whole thing be, a one sided love affair.

So Close... And Yet So Far Away

You're so close... and yet so far away. Its like you're right here with me but I can't be with you.
And you know what you do. You do it all the time. Always running through my mind.
I wish you didn't make me feel this way. Got me saying things I shouldn't say. Or do.
You're so close.. and yet so far away.
And you've taken what wasn't yours to take. My heart.
You've got it wrapped around your finger.
Its as if you pulled the trigger. On me.
Now I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't breathe.
Without you.
You know what you do to me but you don't care.
Its just so unfair that I could feel this way for you.
You're so close and yet so far away.
I can see you, but I can never make you stay.
So I'll just run. I'll just run away from you.
And I know you won't try to stop me. I know you won't be there if I fall.
No. Not. At. All.

..Uninspired.. and Uninhibited... Part Deux

    This uninspired and uninhibited behavior has taken on a new form.
What once was dormant has come undone and out!
Like a life force before me, I can clearly see
that woe is you and woe is me.

   But before I launch into a soliloquy
of how things should or ought to be.
Let me first, examine me.

   Perhaps now that I realized that the void comes from within
instead of without,
I can start to decipher & recreate
A. Better. Me.

?Does such a person exist?
Is there still hope for me?

Some say yes.
And some say no.
But honestly, no body knows.

I'm not really looking for statements.
I'm not really looking for opinions.

I'm just yearning for a learning of
what. it. all. means.